A Baboon and his Fairy
by Kittyjkat21
Summary: Stupid name, I know. But anyway, basically, takes place after the Holy war, love blossoms between Orihime and Renji while a new threat is on the loose and Seiretei has to stop it before they're destroyed, yada yada, full summary inside, you know the drill lol.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** I'm not Tite Kubo; I don't own the most wonderful anime I know of; Bleach. The word alone gives me chills. Just kidding. Lol. Though, I do own the OC villains that will appear. Everyone who's read my previous stories know that I just can't help myself...I have to ad OC villains...Dunno' why...maybe just to spice things up a bit...oh wait...I'm off topic...

**Description:** Renji/Orihime. Takes place after the Holy War. Things are just settling down and Orihime is adjusting to being a shinigami in the 4th Division while Ichigo and Rukia have gotten engaged. Renji seems calmer since he'd taken Shunsui's place as Captain of the 8th Division, having named Chad and Karin as twin lieutenants. As a new darkness rises, will Seiretei be able to piece themselves back together or will there be even more losses? Some that one can't come back from...

**A/N:** By the way, there are spoilers in this story! Just letting my wonderful readers know! And on a completely different note from the warning, I haven't discontinued my Witness Protection Sucks story; don't worry. I'll work on that one and this one with mostly regular updates, lol. And yes, I know that the arc isn't finished yet, but I just couldn't help myself, okay? And yeah, a lot of people died, but hey; they're still in the story, so I hope there's no problem... Anyway, hope you enjoy.

**Chapter 1: Depression and Confession**

Orihime sighed quietly, sinking into a chair at the 8th; it was a monthly gathering for celebration about surviving yet another trial, held by Captain Renji. Ichigo had replaced Renji as Kuchiki Taicho's lieutenant, while the 4th Division was still captainless. Some say that Orihime would take Retsu's place, but Orihime doubted it. She barely had enough energy as an unranked healer. Her Shun Shun Rika worked differently now that they were all combined into a zanpakuto instead of just fairies that came from hair pins, and she still hadn't figured out how to bring out his/her (the zanpakuto refused to speak to her) potential.

"Hey! Orihime!" Rukia called, jogging over and smiling. "Glad to see you here! You haven't been the past few months and you've missed the last several SWA meetings. Is everything okay?"

"Oh? Yes...I've just been tired, is all..." Orihime smiled, yawning. "See?"

"They're overworking you that much, huh?" Rangiku had come over, hands on her ample hips, breasts showing just as much as always. Her short hair bounced around her shoulders, having been straightened tonight with an added flip. All in all, it was a cute look for the tall, voluptuous woman.

"Well...it's not so bad...I just have to regain control over my powers; they're so different from what I'm used to, but I'll get it, don't you worry. It's just like that time when Rukia was taken and I had to learn how to use them from Yoruichi and man, that was hard, but I did eventually get it, you know, so it was okay. I'm sure this time will be just as okay and..." Orihime was babbling again. She knew it, but she couldn't let them know just how depressed she really was. She missed Tatsuki and she missed talking to all of her fairies individually, but now, they were all the same being.

Orihime felt weaker and more useless than ever. Ichigo had never really noticed her like she'd hoped he would. She'd been so sure when he'd saved her at Hueco Mundo that that would be her moment, but no. He chose Rukia. _But I'm so happy for them. They're so happy and they're going to have wonderful babies that I'm going to help deliver..._ And Orihime had a kindred spirit in Renji, who'd felt the same about Rukia since forever.

Rangiku and Rukia listened to Orihime's chatter patiently, openly. They were true friends; there for her even when she got annoying and babbly. _Just like Tatsuki would be if she were here or if I were there...If I hadn't died..._ "Just hang in there, Hime," Rukia smiled. "It'll get better."

Orihime nodded, though she doubted it would. She stood up. "Well, I'm going to get some punch..." She'd decided against sake; exhaustion wouldn't mix very well with alcohol.

"Yeah, catch up with you later!" Rangiku smiled brightly as Orihime gave a just as bright smile and made her way to the banquet table. All the captains pitched in, it having been Kyoraku Soutaicho's idea in the first place, which was also why the celebrations were held at the 8th Division. Orihime poured herself some punch, almost bumping into Renji.

"Oh, I'm sorry Abarai Taicho, I wasn't looking where I was going! Did I spill any punch on you? I hope not, because the last time I spilled punch on clothing, it took me months to really get it out, and by that time, the entire skirt was faded; not that you'd wear a skirt_"

"It's okay, Orihime, really." Renji laughed softly. "You talk too much."

"Sorry, I've been told that before...and that I daydream too much and come up with such wild stories that no one really believes me anymore_"

"It's okay. I was actually coming to find you." Both Renji and Orihime had matured over the past two years; the battles taking away some of their lightheartedness and much of Orihime's innocence (though that part was due mostly to Nnoitra and Aizen...yeah, not going into that). They were more serious, though Orihime remained ditzy and Renji remained wild and...well, Renji.

"Oh really? If it's about that time I broke your red dragon, I did fix it..."

"No-Wait a second, when did you break my red dragon?"

"What red dragon?"

"The one that you just said you broke!"

"I broke something?"

"I dunno', you said you fixed it..."

"Did I?"

"Yeah, you did...I think...Wait, what?"

"I dunno'. What were you looking for me for?"

"Uh...Oh yeah! Walk with me?"

"Okay, sure." Orihime followed him, drinking her punch. The past few months, she'd grown to like Renji; maybe even love him. But she was afraid that he'd choose someone else; just like Rukia did. _Generally, when someone older or more superior to you tells you to walk with them, it's not good...what if he's going to tell me that he found someone else and that he's happy with them? Just like all the other guys I've liked...Will I always be the supportive wallflower nodding and smiling and acting ditzy and like I either don't notice or don't care?_

What if he chose Rangiku, or the newly fully grown Neliel? Something like that would just break Orihime's heart. After having lost Ulquiorra (to death) _and_ Ichigo (to Rukia) _and_ Uryu (to Nemu) _and_ Chad (to Karin) {though Ichigo affected her the most, he having had her strongest feelings directed at him}, Orihime didn't think she could take much more heart break. Just look at what it did to Zaraki Taicho. He was more violent and depressed and sexually frustrated than ever...

"So Orihime, I've noticed you've been...well not yourself lately..." Renji turned to her. "It's got me worried."

_Ugh. Not __**another**__ one..._ Orihime inwardly groaned, but hid it with one of those forced, bright smiles that she was so good at. "Oh, I'm fine_"

"Don't. Don't pull that s*** with me," Renji interrupted her sternly, his hands on her shoulders as he stepped in front of her. He spoke quieter the second time. "Please, Orihime...just tell me what's wrong." His eyes were uncharacteristically soft; Ichigo's eyes had never been like that unless he looked at Rukia.

Orihime sighed, shoulders slumping. Renji had always been there more than Ichigo had. He knew about the Nnoitra and Aizen thing, and her feelings for Ulquiorra, however brief they were. He also knew about all the minor crushes and of course he knew about the whole Ichigo matter; that was a given.

"I'm just not useful," She admitted. "Not as useful as I was before, since I lost most of my control over Shun Shun Rika since they combined and became a zanpakuto that doesn't really like me all that much...and then there's the whole Ichigo and Rukia thing and..." Her eyes welled up despite how much she wished the tears to stay at bay. "And I miss Tatsuki...and my aunt, however estranged she is, but most of all Tatsuki, who's gone off to college now and I can't go see her except for when I'm discharged to the human world, and I won't be discharged to the human world because I'm so weak and...and..." The tears fell and Renji embraced her; one of the rare moments when he was gentle.

"I'm sorry..." He muttered. "Look, I'll try to get you discharged with me, okay? We'll visit her together when we're on hollow rounds or I can just stand outside the door while you two talk or something."

"R-really?" Orihime smiled through her tears, sniffling softly and looking up at Renji.

"Yeah. And if you want, I can help you with Shun Shun Rika...you know, Zanpakuto 101."

"You're the best, Renji!" Orihime kissed his cheek, hugging him again, not seeing the smile that played on his lips as he stroked her hair.

"Yeah...yeah, you are too, Hime-chan..."

She looked up at him, tilting her head to the side and he awkwardly rubbed the back of his head. "Uh...yeah...I uh...Not great with words here, but I...I love...I love you?" Renji stuttered.

"I love you too!" Orihime kissed his cheek again, her head on his chest. She could hear his sigh of relief and in truth, she felt equally relieved. She also felt lighter and as cheerful and energized as she was two years ago before this whole mess started. Renji had brought her back to that; not Ichigo. Renji Abarai, recently named captain of the 8th Division in Shunsui Kyoraku's place.

o0o

"Is that the girl?" A deep voice boomed, watching the sleeping Orihime.

"Yes," A smoother, more feminine voice answered. "Orihime Inoue."

"I see. She is the one who can turn back time and manipulate space?"

"Oh, she could at one point, but I know not whether she can do such things again. Not with her powers so out of control."

"Renji Abarai will fix that, don't worry."

"I should hope so."

There was a grunt in agreement. "We will wait in silence until the moment to strike."

"Yes, Lord Aizen."

"Do not call me by that name. I am not my weak younger brother."

**A/N: So yeah. I hope you enjoy it. I'll bring more updates soon; on both this story and Witness Protection Sucks. (WPS). Also, I know that Ichigo is stronger than Byakuya, but I just thought it'd be funny that he's working under Byakuya while he's engaged to the stoic captain's sister... Also, I know that a lot of people would question why Shunsui would pick Renji of all shinigami to replace him, but hey. Renji's a pretty strong guy now. I bet he could ****_totally _****kick some tail in a fight, especially since the training from the Zero Division. So anyway, for now? Ta~**


	2. The Joys of Being a Shinigami

**Chapter 2: The Joys of Being a Shinigami**

Renji trained with Chad and Karin, instructing them on where they could do better and praising them where they were skilled. Chad was still awkward with a sword, while Karin was still too hot headed to keep her head in a fight. _She's worse than Ichigo_, Renji thought with a sigh, having hoped that he would never have to acknowledge the fact that there was someone in the world worse than Ichigo.

Renji was still good friends with Ichigo, but he did still feel betrayed by him and Rukia. But then again, he was thankful; he truly loved Orihime, and was glad that she hadn't rejected him when he confessed to her. The way her eyes had lit up made his day, seeing as they'd been so dull and dark as of late.

"Oi! Abarai Taicho! Quit thinking about your girl and fight! You're getting excited about the wrong thing!" Karin taunted, tossing her zanpakuto in the air.

"Huh?! I am?! Oh sh_ wait! No the hell I'm not, you little pervert!"

Karin busted out laughing, bending over as she dropped her zanpakuto, pointing at Renji. "OH MY GOD! CHAD, DID YOU SEE THE LOOK ON HIS FACE?! _PRICELESS!_ Whoooo, I wish I'd taken a picture! Oh my God...oh my God, that was _amazing._ He didn't even know whether he had a boner or_ Shit, man!"

Karin barely managed to pick up her zanpakuto and block Renji's swing in time to keep the blade from taking her eye out "Never let your guard down, Kurosaki." Renji smirked, satisfied that he achieved some degree of vengeance.

He could hear Ichigo chuckling from the sidelines. Chad shook his head, sighing at his girlfriend's antics; both he and Renji had their hands full trying to keep the rowdy Kurosaki in line. No matter how much she denied it, Karin took after her brother and her father. Yuzu was the only truly sane person in the bunch.

"OI! RENJI!" Renji turned, seeing Ikkaku and Yumichika coming his way. He inwardly groaned, hoping Ikkaku wasn't looking for _another_ fight. _Ikkaku's okay and all, but come on, man! Ya' gotta' quit fightin' __**sometime...**_

"What?" Renji called back. Chad and the Kurosaki's came over to join the 8th Division captain.

"I heard you and Inoue are goin' out."

"And...?" Renji muttered, rolling his eyes. He'd been faced with all kinds of people coming up to him and asking him about it; if it was true.

"_Aaaand_ Kenpachi wants to fight you."

"What? _Why_?" _Shit. _Kenpachi was even more bad ass now that he had contact with his zanpakuto. Renji wasn't afraid of Kenpachi, he just didn't want to go through all the trouble of an NDE.

"Because since Orihime doesn't really have anyone else to vouch for her, besides her friends an' all who either don't care or are happy for y'all, so Yachiru told the captain that he should fight you to make sure you were dedicated to Orihime. You don't have to win; you just have to fight hard enough to show him you do have what it takes to protect Orihime."

"When and where?" Renji wouldn't back down from a challenge, insane, bad *** captain or not.

"Right now!" Ikkaku grinned.

"Oi! Can we watch? I wanna' see Big Red get his ass kicked!" Karin smirked.

"Shut up, you!" Renji pushed her into Ichigo and Chad, turning back to Ikkaku and Yumichika. "Don't tell Orihime; I don't want her to worry about me."

"Oh, she's already there," Yumichika stated with a dismissing wave of his delicate hand. "It would be unbeautiful if she couldn't come to your aid after our captain completely dominates you."

"_Whoa_, didn't know Kenpachi rolled that way," Karin snickered.

"Well...every time he fights Ichigo, they both end up half naked..." Chad remarked.

"WE DO NOT!" Ichigo objected vehemently, glaring at his best friend and little sister, who both shrugged. Renji thought for a minute and nodded.

"Yeah Ichigo...ya' kinda' do..." Karin glanced at her older brother, completely serious.

"Well, now that I think about it, every time he fights someone he ends up half naked...and he usually only fights men..." Yumichika mused, his face contorting in disgust. "How unbeautiful. Such barbaric tactics just to see another man's body." The feminine "man" sniffed haughtily.

"Since our soul pagers connected with the internet, _you_ see other men's bodies without even lifting your lazy ass-less wonder off the damn couch," Ikkaku snapped dryly.

"Do I even wanna' know?" Ichigo asked, edging away from the fence.

"_I_ don't even want to know and I'm his best friend," Ikkaku muttered.

"I do _not_ do that! They pop up on my screen!" Yumichika objected.

Renji snorted. "And yet it doesn't happen to anyone else." Ikkaku smirked at this comment.

"And face it, Feathers-for-Brains, _I'm_ manlier than you!" Karin laughed, hopping the fence. "Now let's _go_! I wanna' see Renji get his ass kicked!"

"That's _Renji Taicho_ to you, ya' little bitch!"

"Don't call my sister a bitch!"

"Well you and I _both_ know it's true, Carrot Top!"

"I don't have a fuckin' afro, damnit!"

"Yeah you do! It's just spikey!"

"Renji, I know you're a dumb ass, but even _you_ should know that afros are poofy _and_ curly! _My _hair is FUCKING **_NEITHER!_**" Ichigo's voice grew louder with every word. Renji smirked.

"Come on, we don't want to keep the maniac waiting."

o0o

"So ya' ready to put up a good fight? Cause if ya' don't, ya' can't date her!" Kenpachi smirked, his zanpakuto over his shoulder. "I won't even use my shikai. Ya' better be ready though."

"Yeah. Bring it," Renji spun Zabimaru in his hand. He knew that Saru and Hebi would want to come out after the fight to talk about it and see how they can grow stronger. And then after that, the two would probably argue and Saru would go hang out with Senbonzakura while Hebi would pester Karin and Chad for a while.

"Well here I come, Pinapple!" Zaraki shot forward, swinging his sword. Renji blocked.

"Roar! Zabimaru!" Renji yelled, striking Kenpachi's chest. The blade didn't make a deep cut, but the force sent Zaraki back up a few steps to keep from falling on his ass.

Zaraki came back at him and Renji blocked, wrapping the separated Zabimaru around the old, chipped blade and the ginger captain pulled on it, trying to yank Zaraki towards him, only to duck as Zaraki wrenches his zanpakuto out, swinging for Renji's head. _Fuck man!_

"Be careful, Ji-kun!" Orihime called. Renji nodded. Of course he'd try to be careful. Kenpachi was a freaking monster.

"You've grown some balls since you left my division," Kenpachi smirked.

"Just don't get a hard on during the fight, Captain," Yumichika remarked from the sidelines, looking at his nails. "Renji boy is already taken."

"Oi! Who ya' callin' bo_ Holy shit man, watch where you're swinging that thing!" Renji narrowly missed being clubbed in the balls by Kenpachi's zanpakuto.

"Concentrate on the fight, not the drag queen!"

"'Aye-aye, Captain," Renji muttered, sarcasm a prominent character in the tone of his voice. Kenpachi smirked.

"So ya' wanna be a wise ass? I've always loved putting wise asses in their place."

Their blades crossed again and again as the fight wore on. Kenpachi made the most cuts despite Renji's good start, but Renji dealt a pretty good amount of damage himself. That said, Kenpachi still tried to kill him, apparently forgetting that this was a fight for Orihime's honor and not Renji's head.

When the dust finally settled and both Renji and Kenpachi were healed, everyone sat down and got some sake.

"Did Kenny have fun?" A certain pink haired she-devil popped up out of nowhere. Over the years, Yachiru had gotten older and slightly, _slightly_ more mature. Her face had lost its childhood plumpness and her hair was mostly pink, but natural golden and silver streaks had formed in it, giving her hair an exotic look. Her eyes were more of a red-violet than a reddish brown now and she carried her zanpakuto, which hadn't grown, on her back. Her voice was mildly deeper, but still somewhat girlish.

"Yeah," Kenpachi smirked, nodding. "Though I say the rematch better be more excitin'. This was over too fast."

"Dude! We fought two hours!"

"So? That coulda' _easily_ gone on for at least three!"

"You're insane!"

"Of course he is." Yachiru sat down after grabbing a bottle of sake. Renji noticed she'd squeezed quite close to Ikkaku instead of Kenpachi. "All bad asses are insane." She crossed her legs, leaning back against the back of her chair.

"Oi. They're not _all_ insane! I'm bad ass and I've got my head on straight!" Ichigo objected.

"And yet you're the one who's always in the thick of things. A sane person would take a break," Karin argued, taking a swig of sake.

"You're too young for that!" Ichigo snapped, changing the subject as he snatched the bottle out of Karin's hand.

"Oi! Give that back, Carrot Afro!"

"IT'S NOT AN AFRO!"

"LIKE HELL IT'S NOT AN AFRO! LOOK AT THE THING, IT'S RIDICULOUS, YA' DUMB ASS!"

"I WAS TWENTY THIRD OUT OF OVER TWO HUNDRED STUDENTS! HOW THE HELL IS THAT DUMB ASS QUALITY, DWARF?!"

"BOOKS SMARTS AIN'T REAL SMARTS AND I'M STILL GROWING! AT LEAST I DON'T GET A HARD ON EVERY TIME I FIGHT!"

"**YOU DON'T HAVE ANYTHING TO GET A HARD ON WITH, UNLESS YOU'RE NOT TELLING ME SOMETHING!"**

"Don't worry Ichigo…she is like any normal girl…as far as anatomy," Chad spoke in his usual slow, deep tone.

"_HOW THE HELL WOULD YOU KNOW, DAMNIT?!_"

"Because…I was 11th out of…that 200…and I _do_ have real smarts."

Karin snickered. "Ichi-nii got played!"

"That was not getting played, you little brat!"

"Sure it was. He just made you look even stupider than you already are, didn't he?" Yachiru piped up cheerfully.

"How unbeautiful; these insults aren't even good," quipped Yumichika daintily.

"Neither is your hair, Yumi. Did you check the mirror this morning?" Renji smirked, knowing that this would rile the narcissistic warrior up.

Yumichika's perfect posture and serene expression wavered slightly and everyone shared knowing smirks. "Y-you're just trying to yank on my chain…" The man stuttered weakly, nearly panicked, a hand reaching for his ebony locks.

"We're trying to help you out of the goodness of our hearts, Yumi. If you don't want to listen, I suppose you'll just have to stay that way," Yachiru replied innocently.

"If you'd excuse me for a moment while I go make myself beautiful and presentable." The vain shinigami hurriedly left the premises.

"That wasn't very nice, guys, though I suppose it was pretty funny…but I wouldn't want it done to me, but then again, he did kind of deserve it for being so high and haughty. Still, though. I think his feelings are really hurt, or maybe not yet, but they'll be hurt when he finds out that we were all trying to pick on him and then he'll come say that we were being unbeautiful and_"

"Don't worry about it, Inoue," Kenpachi shrugged it off. "He can either grow a pair of balls or go die in a ditch. If he does the latter, he better die fighting though or I'll resurrect him just so I can fight and kill him myself." The vain shinigami hurriedly left the premises.

_Typical Kenpachi…_ Renji chuckled silently. He stood. "Well, I better get back to the eight. Hey Carrot Afro, tell Captain Kuchiki I said 'hi'." He kisses Orihime's temple. "Have a good day, Hime-chan.

"NOT AN AFRO!"

"Shut up, Ichigo, we're not going to let you live it down."

"I hate you all."

_The joys of being a shinigami. _

**A/N: Okay, so I know that it took me a long time to finish this chapter, but like I said in WPS, I was really busy. I hope you like this chapter, because I wanted to add a little humor as well as an "honor brawl". Also, my mother has permitted me to write curse words so long as it's not excessive to help the story flow, so no more star thingies! But I'm too lazy to change all the old ones, so sorry lol. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter, so R&R if you please. Ta~**


	3. An Explosive View

**Chapter 3: An Explosive View**

Orihime hummed to herself as she wiped the sweat from her brow. Training with Renji was hard work, but it was rejuvenating to know that she was getting stronger. Shun Shun Rika was beginning to respond more; it sounded like two voices, an adult male and younger female, but Orihime didn't know for sure.

Renji had let Zabimaru out of their sword form and Saru and Hebi were arguing as usual. "AT LEAST I DIDN'T GET STUCK IN A WINDOW YOU FAT ASS BROAD!"

"OH WHAT EVER, YOU IDIOTIC LITTLE BRAT! AT LEAST I'M NOT THE ONE ALWAYS HUMPING MY OTHER HALF'S LEG IN MY SLEEP!" Saru smacked Hebi in the head angrily.

"DON'T HIT ME, DAMNIT!" He smacks her tail-end. Orihime watched the scene in partial amusement, confusion, and worry. Was this display normal zanpakuto behavior? Orihime didn't really know; Zangetsu was always calm, but he was just one being. _Does that mean Shun Shun Rika will be like this?_ Orihime giggled at the mere thought of seeing and hearing her zanpakuto argue like Renji's did.

"OI! IDIOTS! QUIT ARGUING AND START TRAINING, DAMNIT!" Renji called as he came out from the shower rooms. "You can go in now, Orihime. Are you sure it was okay to let me go first?"

Orihime giggled mischievously. "Oh, trust me, Ji-kun. You needed it _much_ more than I did!"

"Oh, thanks." Renji playfully rolled his eyes, kissing her forehead as she stood to go to the shower rooms.

Orihime snickered playfully. "You're welcome, Ji-kun." She made her way to the shower rooms, not paying attention as she hummed a merry tune, undressing and stepping under the warm water, letting it flow over her body. It felt nice, even though she'd previously been soaked with her own heated sweat.

_I guess there's just something about showers that makes you want a really warm one, no matter how hot you are…I wonder if there are people who prefer cold showers though, instead of the hot ones. Maybe, though the only time I've heard of cold showers is when someone is really aroused and needs to settle down. But that can't be pleasant…I would hate to have a cold shower…Though, I do like a cool pool or the cool ocean. So I wonder why having a cold shower is so different. Maybe it's the pressure…or maybe it's all psychological depending on what we're used to. Hmmmm…_

Orihime was so lost in her thoughts that the faint, unfamiliar pressure went unnoticed by her as she continued to hum to herself, washing her hair. But Karin noticed it as she walked in, seeing a strange, floating red light hovering by Orihime's shower. Drawing her zanpakuto, Karin sliced through the light.

"The _FUCK_?!" Both Karin and Orihime screamed as the shower rooms were enveloped in an explosion and they were blown away from each other, Orihime landing in a ditch in the 9th Division and Karin barreling through a window in the 5th. If the two weren't Shinigami, they'd have surely been scattered bits around Seiretei before they could say "boom".

Orihime shakily sat up, feeling cloth drape over her as she nursed a broken leg and four or five broken ribs. She could barely breathe and it felt like iron claws were trying to crush her. She was vaguely reminded of how she felt when Szayel tried to experiment on her by seeing how much of a vasto lord's reiatsu she could take in an enclosed space.

"Are you okay, Inoue-chan?" She looked up, seeing Fukutaicho Hisagi bent over her with concern etched into his features. She nodded. "What happened?"

Before Orihime could answer, Renji was running across the field, hopping the gate to the 9th Division. "ORIHIME!" He yelled, sliding to land beside her.

"I'm okay, Renji, really!" The effort to speak hurt, but she had to reassure him. "I've only got a few broken bones, nothing that can't be fixed, so don't worry about me! I'm still as fit as a fiddle!" She smiled despite the pain, though she imagined that it was quite strained.

"Can you tell us what happened?" Muguruma Taicho had made his way over, eyes and features severe. Orihime vaguely found herself wondering if Karin was going through this interrogation and if Chad had found her. After a lengthy pause, Muguruma Taicho growled quietly in frustration. "Well, spit it out, damnit. We don't have all fuckin' day."

"Lay off, Muguruma," Renji snapped. "Take your time Orihime…"

"Well the thing is…I don't know for sure. I was in the shower, I remember that, humming and wondering about the difference between showers and pools, and why people prefer hot showers even though they're hot before they get in and all that and washing my hair. Well, I heard some strange noise, almost like a cero hissing by, only I didn't feel the hollow's reiatsu...actually, I couldn't feel any reiatsu other than the familiar ones all around me. But then everything got really hot and I heard Karin drop the F-bomb and then I landed in this ditch with all the broken bones and Fukutaicho Hisagi threw this cloth over me and asked me what happened and Renji came up and yelled my name and I told him I was okay then Muguruma Taicho came up and asked me what happened and I was wondering what happened to Karin and if she was being questioned too and if Chad had found her and _then_ Muguruma Taicho told me_"

"Okay, we get it. So you basically don't know what happened," Muguruma Taicho sighed. Orihime shrugged, wincing at the agony the motion caused

"Let's get you to the 4th Division, Hime-chan…" Renji murmured in a rare display of softness, gingerly lifting Orihime up and cradling her. She nodded. She had a high tolerance for pain, sure, but there were some things that one couldn't really be expected to bear no matter how high their pain tolerance was. This was one of those things.

o0o

Karin groaned as she sat up, holding her head. She'd landed on something soft-no, some_one_ soft. She flies off of the angry small person and into a desk. Looking back, Karin sees a seething Soi Fon. "What is the meaning of this, Kurosaki Fukutaicho?" The young woman hissed, dark eyes narrowed.

"There was_"

"I know. I have already received word from my stealth forces that there was an explosion. Was it some prank that went wrong like the last time you and your brother had a falling out?"

_Okay, so she does have some leverage for going all bitch mode on me and thinking this whole damn thing is my fault, although it kind of really isn't. I don't know what that thing was that I sliced up, but I have a feeling it wasn't good…How did Orihime not_ No, I can see how she didn't notice it; she's such a ditz._

"There was a red orb of light and this unfamiliar pressure, so I swiped at it and it exploded! I guess it wasn't very dangerous since Neither Orihime nor I was blown to complete bits. At least…I don't think Orihime was blown to bits…"

"She wasn't, I assure you." Soi Fon crossed her arms, then turned. "Come. You will accompany me to the 4th Division to make sure that you are truly unharmed." Soi Fon walked out. Karin rolled her eyes, but followed the smaller captain.

o0o

"So _that's_ what happened," Orihime mused after she'd been taken care of at the 4th Division and Karin told her the story from _her_ point of view.

"Yeah. You _really_ need to pay more attention. That's how you died in the first place, you know."

Orihime knew that Karin hadn't meant it in a cruel way, but the statement did strike a certain nerve. Orihime had been so intent on healing Renji after he'd been impaled by a Quincy arrow, she hadn't noticed that the Quincy attack had completely impaled her until she'd fallen into a puddle of blood and heard Renji's anguished cry as the world began to fade into inky, blurry darkness.

Renji cast his female co-lieutenant a stern glare. She shrugged at him and he sighed. "It's okay, Renji," Orihime said quietly before Renji could tear Karin a new one. "Anyway…We need to find out what that red orb thingy that Karin described is…It's awful strange, don't you think? You don't think it's another enemy to deal with, do you? I hope not, I just want some peace for once, you know?" Orihime sighed. "I honestly hate all this war, it's not fair! We're losing so many people! First Aizen, Gin, and Tousen to treason, and then we almost lost Rukia and Ulquiorra died even though he always tried to help me; I don't really think he was evil like the rest. But anyway, we lost all those people in the Holy War…I just…I don't want to lose anyone else_"

Renji put a finger to her lips. "We won't, okay?" He smiled. "I promise that we'll _all_ make it through this, okay? We won't lose anyone else; I won't let that happen. I'll always protect you, Orihime, in all ways." There it was again, that soft side to Renji. Orihime smiled to herself. She did feel safe with the captain of the 8th Division. It was refreshing to have found a man that she knew wouldn't ever leave her. She almost didn't believe it.

Karin walked out, obviously not wanting to sit in the same room with the overly 'mushy-lovey-dovey' couple. Orihime watched her go, wondering how the younger Kurosaki hadn't gotten hurt in the blast. Maybe it was because the dark haired twin had more reiatsu than the orange haired former high schooler.

_I always seem to be caught in the middle of bad things before I even realize what's going on…You'd think that I'd learn my lesson by now, but I guess not. Maybe there's a missing link in my brain or something…I guess old habits are just hard to break. Yeah, that's right…I'm just so used to being ditzy as a defense mechanism that I automatically start drifting off into space whether I'm threatened or not. Yes, that's totally it!_

"Orihime?" Orihime jumped as Renji's hand touched her shoulder.

"Oh! Sorry, Ji-kun! I was completely lost in my thoughts! Umm….what were you saying?"

"Just wondering if you were ready to go now."

"Oh yes! I'm fit as a fiddle!"

"Are…are you sure?"

"YEP!" Orihime jumped out of bed. "Come on! Let's go eat; I'm starving!" Grabbing Renji's hand, Orihime dragged him out of the room, giggling. In truth though, she had a bad feeling about the explosion. If it had been watching her before Karin stabbed it, then what else was it doing? Could there be even more? Who else were they watching and what was their purpose? Who were _they_?

o0o

"So the spying orb failed."

"Yes, my lord."

"We must send one of our own."

"Of course, my lord, but who?"

"One of the younglings. Have them 'join' the academy. Send the strongest one we have."

"As you wish." The woman stood, leaving the dark room. Aizen's brother stood at the pool, watching Orihime giggle and laugh as she dragged Renji through a resteraunt. The girl was so foolish; she didn't seem to suspect a thing. But then again, Aizen's brother supposed it was better that way.

Orihime was the key to eternal life. Aizen's brother knew that he was one of the only ones who knew of this fact. He'd do anything to get the girl and devour her pure soul. Only then would he be invincible. He could turn the world upside down; cast it into chaos. That would show Sosuke who was the _real _god. And it _isn't _his little brother who's locked in a cage. No cage will hold _this_ god.

**A/N: Ok. I am SOOO sorry it took so long to update! First I was sick, then I had to take the U.S. History state test, then there were final exams and all that jazz…My word, I've been so busy lately lol. But I'm out of school, so hopefully it won't be too long. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter; I know it's not as long as I've been trying to make them and I'm sorry. R&R and once again. Sorry for the long wait. Love y'all! CX**


	4. Promises and Arguments

**Chapter 4: Promises and Arguments **

Orihime jumped for joy as she produced the orange shield. Her zanpakuto's new name was Shune no Rikari. Shune being a tall man with dark red hair tied into a low, neat ponytail and Rikari being a little girl with her pale green hair tied into pigtails. Shune had yellow eyes that looked like the harvest moon while Rikari had large, navy blue eyes. Shune was serious and Rikari bouncy and energetic.

"Now remember, Orihime," Shune lectured. "I'm for healing while Rikari is for attacking. Don't get us mixed up or you could end up in a bad position. We aren't just a shield anymore. Rikari can shoot projectiles or change into any weapon you want."

"But I'm not a combat person…" Orihime objected as Rikari played with Hebi's collar.

"You're going to have to be. The 4th Division is the most vulnerable Division in Seiretei. It's even more so now that Retsu Unohana is dead. You must rise to the challenge, Orihime. Aren't you tired of having to be protected by everyone? Tired of living in their shadows as they grow before you?"

Orihime looked down. Indeed she was. She wanted to be useful; not the scared little girl she'd been all of her life. Sora had protected her, then Ichigo, then Uryu and Chad, then Ulquiorra, and just so many others. She couldn't fight like them she knew, but she could try. And Shune no Rikari was her chance to try. She would learn to give her all; just like all of her friends have done for her for years. It was _her _turn to step up to the plate and take the bat. It was her turn to shine and hit a homerun.

"You're right, Shune…I can't keep hiding on the sidelines…letting others risk their lives while I sit and play doctor or damsel in distress." Orihime could feel a new fire. She couldn't be that ditzy little girl anymore. It was time that she grew up and took some responsibility. It was time that she became the woman that her mother wasn't and that Sora had wanted her to be. No more shaking in fear; fear would fuel her.

"So we'll learn and grow together!" Rikari fist pumped cheerfully, letting go of Hebi's collar. Hebi rubbed his neck in aggravation, pouting that he wasn't getting Rikari's attention anymore. Shune shook his head.

"Then stop with the games and let's get started already. We have much to learn and do in such little time. We don't know when our enemies will strike, so we must be as prepared as possible."

Orihime was reminded of the song from Disney's _Mulan_, and it began playing through her head:

**_Let's get down to business_**

**_To defeat the Huns_**

**_Did they send me daughters_**

**_When I asked for sons?_**

**_You're the saddest bunch_**

**_I ever met,_**

**_But you can bet _**

**_Before we're through_**

**_Mister I'll make a man_**

**_Out of you_**

**_Tranquil as a forest _**

**_But on fire within_**

**_Once you find your center_**

**_You are sure to win_**

**_You're a spineless, pale,_**

**_Pathetic lot_**

**_And you haven't got a clue_**

**_Somehow I'll make a man_**

**_Out of you_**

_I'm never gonna' catch my breath_

_Say goodbye to those who knew me_

_Boy I was a fool in school _

_For cutting gym_

_This guy's got 'em_

_Scared to death_

_Hope he doesn't see_

_Right through me_

_Now I really wish _

_I could swim_

_(Be a man)_

**_We must swift as _**

**_The coursing river_**

_(Be a man)_

**_With all the force of _**

**_A great typhoon_**

_(Be a man) _

**_With all the strength _**

**_Of a raging fire_**

**_Mysterious as _**

**_The dark side of the moon_**

**_Time is racing towards us_**

**_Till the Huns arrive_**

**_Heed my every order_**

**_And you might survive_**

**_You're unsuited for _**

**_The rage of war_**

**_So pack up, go home, _**

**_You're through_**

**_How could I make a man_**

**_Out of you_**

_(Be a man)_

**_We must swift as _**

**_The coursing river_**

_(Be a man)_

**_With all the force of _**

**_A great typhoon_**

_(Be a man) _

**_With all the strength _**

**_Of a raging fire_**

**_Mysterious as _**

**_The dark side of the moon_**

_(Be a man)_

**_We must swift as _**

**_The coursing river_**

_(Be a man)_

**_With all the force of _**

**_A great typhoon_**

_(Be a man) _

**_With all the strength _**

**_Of a raging fire_**

**_Mysterious as _**

**_The dark side of the moon_**

**_HUH!_**

"Orihime."

"Huh?"

"Focus. What were you thinking of?"

"Oh, I'm sorry! I was just playing a song in my head. It totally fit this situation and it was awesome! You're going to have to watch the movie _Mulan_ one day, it's really good. The song I was thinking of was_"

"_Focus_, Orihime," Shune said again. "You mustn't lose focus. That is one of, if not the most important rule to battle. Never let your guard down. I could've killed you in over a thousand different ways during this time and you wouldn't even know it." He didn't have to add the _just like you did last time_ part; it was clearly understood. Orihime sighed, nodding. She'd already broken her promises to herself just a few moments before.

_It's so hard…How will I ever be able to accomplish this?_ Orihime shook her head. _No. You can't give up now! You can't depend on everyone like before! It's your life to live and not just theirs! _Orihime nodded, grabbing her zanpakuto. "Okay! I'm ready! Let's go!"

o0o

Renji smiled as he watched Orihime train. Hebi stayed out of the way, but it was obvious he wanted in on the action too.

"That boy has such an obvious crush on Rikari…" Saru muttered, shaking her head.

"Yeah. But ya' gotta admit, it's cute…in a somewhat disturbing way…would that be classified as bestiality?"

"Shut up Renji. You're an idiot." Saru rolled her eyes, leaning against the wall of the window. _But the kid needs a friend his age. Sogyo no Kotowari are the closest ones to his age, but they're too childish and prefer to play pranks than spend time with Hebi. And ever since Karin died and matured, Hebi lost her too. I hope Rikari can treat him a bit better than others have. Sure, the kid has me, but I'm only his other half; like a sister. Kids need more than family in their lives._

"Hey, Saru, you okay?"

"Yeah, just thinkin' to myself," Saru murmured. _He won't be on the outside anymore with any luck. _"You know, despite your previous crushes, you and Orihime are obviously _true_ soul mates."

"How so?"

"Her zanpakuto mirrors yours, dumb ass. Think about it. A grown man; I'm a grown woman. A girl in her late preteens, early teens; Hebi is a boy around the same age. Even your zanpakuto add up."

"Well…I guess you're right," Renji muttered. "That's wild…so why were we so drawn to others? Wouldn't it have clicked the moment we saw each other?"

"Damnit, Renji, love isn't that simple. It doesn't just pop up and say 'HIII I'm love! I'll be with you for the rest of your life! Got any roses?!' out of nowhere. Sometimes, it's more subtle; harsher and colder. You and Orihime were caught up in childish dreams that didn't want to let you go. Rukia was your anchor and reason to get stronger while Ichigo was Orihime's ray of sunshine in the darkness of her brother's death. Your minds and hearts hung onto them desperately, hoping that they could be there forever to guide you.

"But when they broke away, you woke up and smelled the coffee, realizing that there were more options. There was one among all the others."

"Did you get into Rukia's romance books or somethin' again?"

"You fucktard! See if I ever give _you _advice again!" Saru raged, baring her sharpened canines, eyes flashing. "And Kami knows you need all the advice you can get, ya' ginger moron!"

"Saru, calm your fuckin' nips, okay? It's a joke, so quit bein' a bitch!" Renji shot back.

"If you could keep up when someone's talking to you, I wouldn't have to be a bitch!"

"You'd be one for fun!"

"Just like you'll be a moron for fun!"

"Don't throw my words back at me!"

"Don't open yourself up for them!"

"Well…uh…"

"Yeah. That's what I thought."

"Don't hurt yourself."

"Like you do every time you try?"

"Haha."

"I know, I should be a comedian."

"Quit tryin' to have the last word, damnit!"

"Why, too much work coming up with comebacks?"

"NO!"

"Yes…"

"Shut up."

"I refuse."

"If you two do not stop arguing and let me work in peace, I will turn you over to Kurotsuchi Taicho for experimentation," Kuchiki Taicho interjected the "heated debate" icily, not looking up from his paperwork.

"Yes sir…"

**A/N: Okay, another chapter done! I thought I'd add a little humor in this one, so I hope y'all don't mind. Please don't forget to review! CX Ta~**


	5. Schemes Out Back

**Chapter 5: Schemes Out Back**

Orihime giggled as she walked into Renji's office after the 4th Division members who lived elsewhere were allowed to go home. Renji was grumbling over paperwork and muttering about how Saru and Hebi were complete idiots. Orihime leaned over, her arms ghosting over Renji's shoulder as she moved to hug him from behind.

"You know, that'd be done faster if you weren't yelling at a certain zanpakuto," Orihime crooned, kissing Renji's temple and leaning her head on his and rubbing his chest.

Renji sighed. "Or a certain pair of vice captains?"

"_Or_ a certain pair of vice captains," Orihime repeated, nodding and giggling, nuzzling Renji's neck. Her own zanpakuto was hanging out with the others on a group shopping spree. Well, the girls shopped and the guys clowned around and hit on the girls…They were so immature sometimes… But then again, when one looked at their masters, it was easy to understand how…

"I figured," Renji growled, snapping yet another calligraphy brush. By no means was he as graceful as Kuchiki Taicho…Orihime would have to go get him some actual mechanical pens; they wouldn't break as easily.

"How about I help you finish this and then we go out to dinner?" Orihime proposed, giggling, throwing away the broken calligraphy brush. "It would be a welcome distraction, don't you think? And I know you're not a fan of my cooking, so you'll have some food you actually enjoy. Maybe a Western style steakhouse, hmmm? Ooh, I heard that as an act of goodwill towards Sasakibe Fukutaicho's memory, Shunsui Soutaicho somehow managed to set up this place called Outback in the 1st Division. How about we go there? I think it'll be fun! I wonder what kind of food they have. I've never tried Western styled cuisine before, but Rangiku said that it's really, really good. So do Rukia and Ichigo. Just thinking about all the yummy possibilities is making me hungry!"

Renji laughed. "Okay, okay. It's a deal." He got up, pulling Orihime up a chair. Pecking Renji's cheek, the sunset haired fairy sat beside her fiery baboon.

_ He really is a baboon when you think about it. So aggressive and outspoken. I can't decide who's got a bigger mouth; him or Ichigo… But I love that about Renji. His energy and sense of humor and even his temper. Under all the gruff wildness, Renji really is a sweet man; he just doesn't let it show because of his manly pride. I wonder why I didn't realize my affection for him sooner… Was I that caught up in my crush on Ichigo? I wonder if Renji had the same problem with his crush on Rukia… I also have to wonder if Renji still loves Rukia… I know he loves me, but I don't doubt that he still has feelings for Rukia, because he's loved her for so long; for centuries whereas I've loved Ichigo for…Well, did I really love Ichigo? Already, that fire is fading, and Renji and I have only been together for a few months, now. Was it really love for Ichigo or just a major crush? Sure, I'd have died for him, but I'd die for anyone…_

Even as Orihime mulled this new question over, she worked diligently and ultimately did more paperwork than Renji, even though she said she'd only help. _Oh well. Even as a captain, he hates his paperwork…It's actually kind of funny when you think about it…_

"Okay! We're done!" Renji hopped up. "So let's go! I'm starved from all that paperwork."

Orihime snickered innocently and followed him out of the door. She didn't mind doing most of the paperwork; it gave her a reason to get lost in her thoughts without anyone interrupting or disturbing them. She knew that Renji wouldn't have interrupted her thinking because he was sound asleep through most of it and drooling on his hand. That fact made Orihime silently question how many times had he done that with Kuchiki Taicho.

"Silly Renji, how can you be starving when you haven't even done anything?" Orihime pushed him playfully, kissing his cheek and playing with his hair.

Renji pouted; not looking very captainly, but certainly looking adorable. She giggled, pecking his lips. "Turn that frown upside down, Ji-kun! I'm only playing."

Renji grinned, chuckling and wrapping his arm around her waist. "I know. Come on before my stomach eats itself."

o0o

As Orihime and Renji wait for their food, they chat about the times while Orihime was still alive, laughing and carrying on about old memories. "Remember that time when Kurosaki-kun thought you were an imposter and tackled you in the hall?" Orihime giggled and Renji winced.

"Don't even remind me…" He muttered. "I thought he was gonna rape me…"

"There's no way he could've raped you, even if he wanted to," Orihime scoffed sweetly, smiling her signature dopey smile and taking Renji's hand in hers. He chuckled, kissing her forehead.

"I know. I'm way too awesome."

Orihime laughed once more, shaking her head and thanking the waiter as he brought their steaks before he bowed and left.

"Man, these smell _amazing_!" Renji exclaimed as he dug in, eating furiously. Orihime ate just as hungrily, but she was a bit neater in doing so. Renji had his steak medium rare and Orihime winced as it bled slightly when he cut it open. "Try a bite, Hime-chan."

"Oh no, that's okay…"

"Oh come on, all the weird foods you eat and ya' can't try a bit of meat?" Renji smirked, waving the fork in her face. "You know ya' waaaaaannnaaaaaaaa!" He coaxed teasingly, bringing the slightly bleeding meat closer to Orihime's lips.

"Renji_" The steak was in her mouth before she could even completely finish his name. She hesitantly chewed; it was _extremely_ chewy and hard to break into smaller parts. It wasn't bad, and in fact, it had a rather bold flavor; more than her own well done steak had.

"Well?" Renji prompted as Orihime swallowed.

"It really _is _good!" She conceded happily, eyes closed in appreciation.

"Good. Next time we come here, you know what to get," Renji grinned, continuing to eat his steak as Orihime went back to eating her own sweet potato fries.

"Yeah," Orihime mused, smiling. "Which means you need to be more open by _my_ food, since I tried yours."

"I try your food…" Renji grumbled awkwardly.

"No you don't. Don't think I can't see you sneaking it to Hebi when you assume I'm not paying attention," Orihime smirked slyly. Renji's guilty expression caused a giggle to free itself from her plump lips. "I also hear you raiding the fridge at night."

"Damn…" Renji chuckled nervously, rubbing the back of his head. "Yeah…okay."

Orihime beamed in triumph, kissing Renji's cheek. "Great! I'll cook breakfast in the morning, then!"

"Sweeeet…"

"Awwe, Ji-kun…"

"I'm only messin' Hime-chan. I'll gladly try your food, 'kay? I won't even complain."

"Promise?"

"Swear to the Soul King."

"Yay!"

o0o

"The affection is sickening." Spit landed vehemently on the ground as heavy footsteps sounded stalking away from the Seeing orb. "My brother should have killed her when he had the chance."

"But then we wouldn't have the opportunity to use her power, my lord."

"I am well aware. Leave me to my venting or the pent up rage will be on _your_ shoulders."

"Of course, sir. My apologies."

"Save your sniveling for someone who gives a damn. You aren't sorry yet. That mishap in the showers will not happen again, am I understood, you little fool?"

"Crystal clear, my lord."

"Good. We strike tonight. Leave none who oppose us alive."

"As you wish."

Dark eyes turned towards the window, which only betrayed the new moon. What a perfect opportunity to strike. Not a star in the sky; they were all hidden by the clouds. Every evil plan thrives in darkness, and he will soon send said darkness to the Seiretei.

** A/N: Sorry again about chapter 4 being so short, but hopefully this one is better. The plot's gettin' it on, folks! I hope I can update sooner, but it's my senior year, so I'm probably going to be very busy. My senior project is writing a novella/novel that's a fantasy twist on the story of Ester, and I have to self-publish it by the end of the semester, so wish me luck! CX Ta~**


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